We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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