Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Congratulations! We have a period
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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