it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
