i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
