this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
My vagina is very pro this idea
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
