i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
