tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
