is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
