New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
