After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
He better not be in your backpack
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
