He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
