Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
