his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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