'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
