girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
