whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize