What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
