she looked like the before picture.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
