shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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