worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize