Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
