I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize
