I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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