ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
