So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize