Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize