I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
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