is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
