even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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