was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
