By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
