well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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