I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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