So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
i drank out of a bidet.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
