Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
