so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
