If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize