don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
