On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
