He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
