Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
