i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
