I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Its about making memories worth repressing
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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