I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
