The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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