You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
