how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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