is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
