We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
