i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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